Alright.......Before I post this let me clear one thing up......I'm being dead serious...........
I have a 10 year old Jack Russell (outside dog) that I love to death...Her name is Lucy....She rides the lawnmower with me and helps me work around in the yard....If I'm stacking brush or something, she is dragging little limbs up too.....She makes every step I make.....probably the smartest dog in the world.....Really....
Lately she likes to get on the gravels in the drive way and sit on her but and spin around.....This ain't the normal behavior that dogs do when they hunker down and scoot across the yard......she is actually sitting and spinning...kid you not...........I have de-wormed her, gave her flea pills, applied Front Line...Etc......She is flea free.......and worm free..............Well some wise butt told me I needed to "milk her anal glands" ........I bout passed out when he told me this......Just the thought of this bout made me toss cookies...........Sooo......My wife calls up one of her friends (Dana), that suppose to know how to do this........I told her to wait till I was at work before Lucy's anal glands were milked.....I wanted no part of this....
When I got home I ask Kristie if they milked em........She kind of smiled and said, "Yeah...We milked them alright".........I said, "Well, did yall get milk".....She said, "Yep...Got Milk".....Keep in mind this has no relation to milk in anyway form or fashion......Well, for a while I thought this cured Lucy from the "Sit and Spin" syndrome, but it didn't....
Few days later Kristie said, "We need to milk Lucy's anal glands again".......I said, "Well call Dana and I'll go out in the shop or something"......She said "No, I can do it, but you'll need to hold her so she won't jump"..........I was thinking, "Any thing that's getting their anal glands milked is gonna jump, and I doubt anybody could hold them back from this"............Sooo, against my better judgment, I agreed.........
Kristie was milking and I was looking at Lucy's face......I wasn't about to inspect what Kristie was doing............After a few minutes Kristie said, "I'm not getting anything. I must be doing it wrong".....Bout that time I looked down and it happened..........Kristie "got" something.......I don't know what it was......Steak Sauce came to mind...........Well, I went to gagging....Thought I was going to pass out again and I was shaking all over..........All I can say, is "Never again".....
I need some advice.......Maybe Lee Youngblood can help me out, cause after all, he is "Selmadogdoc", right?...........Lucy still sits and spins and she seems miserable.......I'm not going to scratch her but and I for sure ain't gonna milk any anal glands.......
I need to get her well soon because I want to train her to re-spool my Weed-Eater line on my trimmer...........Did I mention she is the smartest dog in the world.........any help is appreciated.............Here is Lucy below...
Thanks
